Tuesday, August 9, 2016

The Marking of the Annual Diagnosis Day

Yesterday was four years since the Nurse Practitioner called me at 3:30 pm and said "You have breast cancer". Four years. The same amount of time I spent in my undergrad. The same amount of time I spent in high school. Four years.

It seems forever ago and yesterday all at the same time.

Four years ago, I didn't believe anyone when they said this would just be a blip in the path that is my health. I didn't believe anyone, that after learning I had cancer, that I would ever spend another day not thinking about it. I didn't know what pure gratitude felt like and I had no idea how loved and supported I would feel throughout treatment and into survivorship.

I spent the day, like I have a couple before, doing what my mother and I were supposed to be doing August 8th, 2012, sitting on the dock with my Aunt in Lake Sunappee. We enjoyed the sun, peace and quite and some down time (and my hand is back to normal size!). While sitting quietly in my chair on the dock, the swell of gratitude was impossible to fight. In the four years since I was diagnosed, treated and declared cancer free I have had such a strong army of co-survivors who still would do anything for me. It's amazing to know that that support is out there. In the past four years, I have also seen many individuals who have not had the same happy outcome that cancer journey did. I think of Joanne. I think of Marisa. I think of Mary. I take comfort in knowing they are at peace.

Four years. The olympics are back and I'm watching them in prime time and not the middle of the night because my mind is too full. I may run much slower than I did 4 years ago, but my spirit, my sense of humor and my health are all in tact.

Although I still take it one day at a time, I think I shall now start to look to the future with the classic campaign slogan-4 more years (at the very least)?